Cabin Fever

Sigh.
I'm still in Nashville. It's Thursday of week 4 in Nash, and the 9th straight week away from home. Of the past 61 days I've been home 8. And today, it hit me. I don't know what it was that did it. I've been fine up until this point. I think I got a little antsy in Indianapolis the last week or 2 as well. But today it was extreme. I felt weak and tired last night after work, but I thought it was just the MG. Today, I had almost a panic attack that I was running out of time to do the work, and yet I still had another week to go. I began to vent my stress to my manager, hoping he'd just talk me down, but instead he told me to go home for a week. So instead of finishing one more week here, I'm going to go home, finish up another job, and then head back here in a week or two to finish the last week. I don't know if that's crazy. I feel like it's giving up a little. I feel like I should be strong enough to have been able to finish. But apparently I'm not. I panic.
I finished a photo project that I've been working on for a year. It was a self portrait project. I had to take a picture of myself, any part of me as long as I was in it, every day for a year. Foot, toe, finger, ear, hair, eyeball... anything. And the goal of the picture was to capture the feel of the day. That didn't always happen, but I tried. It was a lot of work trying to think of something creative every day, and there isn't anywhere I went without the camera. But now it's done, and I have this sense of loss I think. Like a part of me is missing. I've gotten so used to taking and posting that picture everyday, and now that it's done, something isn't right. Oh, I'm happy for the break. I absolutely needed it. It was draining. But I still miss it. I'll probably go again, sooner than later. But right now I'm in the mourning process. And maybe that's why the homesickness hit so hard all of a sudden. Don't know.
Just know that I'm tired. I'm stressed. And I'm ready to be done. Get me out of Nashville.