Here we go again

A lot has happened in the past 48 hours.  It's funny how you can go through days, weeks, months without feeling like anything is happening, and then bam! it hits in like a matter of hours. 
Well... let's hit the biggies only.  That will save typing, and help me remember only the things that really matter.

Yesterday... well, 2 days ago? since it's after midnight... was a questionmark?  So this guy, who I've known for awhile since we kinda hang out in the same group, asked me to dinner.  And the whole time I was thinking, it's nothing... but I kept getting the word from our mutual friends that yes, he's into you... it's definitely a date.  And the sis has already taken notice that this guy seems to be interested, and then has proceeded to lay on the pressure to pursue it.  So anyway... let's just say it didn't go so well.  Highlights, or lowlights depending on how you look at it, are he didn't open doors or let me walk in front, or even sit before him.  And even if this wasn't a date, (which it's beginning to look more and more like it wasn't, and I think I'm okay with that) a gentleman should still do these things for a girl.  Is this old fashioned?   Sometimes I get weirded out by a guy that is super over the top about this, but I do appreciate it.  I've been spoiled.  Even my guy friends do this.  I expect a lot.  Anyway... back to the highlights.  He talked about ex-girlfriends a lot.  He, as my sister termed, had a classic case of first "date" TMI spewing.  Nervous babble.  I on the other hand was not nervous at all.  Probably telling.  

He did pay, which was nice.  I offered but he said no no no.  (I did order 2 beers to his 1, is this a faux pas?)  And finally, after paying the bill, he proceeded to text for awhile while I just sat there staring off into space.  We were going to see my bestfriend's band play after.  He finished up his text and said, alright, well, I'm going to the bathroom, wanna just meet there? ..... ?

I had been thinking we'd ride together over there, but apparantly that's not what was going through his brain.
Well, on the bright side, I got to see my friends play good music.

The Devious Means are fantastic.  :)  Maybe I'm bias... but... I dig 'em, and I firmly believe everyone else should too, because The Meanies are coming!



And finally... the brother.  I don't know why this is happening.  All I can say is it's happening on schedule it seems.  "Four" came home from a wedding in Montana this past weekend not feeling so good.  He told us his symptoms and we thought... hmmm... interesting... very similar to what "One" had when she was diagnosed with Diabetes.  Nah... it's probably nothing.   Tonight he went over to "One"'s to test his blood sugar.  He was 366 and normal is between 90 and 120.  It looks like it's still Type 1 diabetes (commonly known as Juvenile Diabetes), which can still develop in adults well into their 30s and 40s (according to "One", our in house Diabetes expert).  I got the MG when I was 25.  "Three" got Lupus when she was 26, "Four" turns 24 next month.  So it seems to be right on schedule doesn't it?  I have no idea what is going to happen tomorrow.  Gonna try and get him in to see an endocrinologist, and then he'll probably get admitted to the hospital.  If no doc, then probably ER, and then hospital.  Maybe this will get me out of work on Friday?  Well... one day at a time.  That's how we do this.

Alone

And now I cling to what I knew
I saw exactly what was true
But oh no more.
That's why I hold,
That's why I hold with all I have.
That's why I hold.
And I will die alone and be left there.
Well I guess I'll just go home,
Oh God knows where.
Because death is just so full and man so small.
Well I'm scared of what's behind and what's before.

I feel this may be true.  Lately I've been pretty depressed about the dating scene.  I feel like I've tapped out all my resources.  Even my friends are asking their friends, or people that know me.  Here is one response one of my friends received:
"I have two problems with that.  1)  Almost every guy I spend time with is married (one of the last options is engaged), and 2) I never think the guys I know are good enough for the girls I think are cool.  *A* fits that category.  However, I will attempt to keep an eye out for this good guy that we hope for her to find."
The problem with this "she's too cool" mentality is that if everyone thinks that... I still end up alone.  Please don't want this for me.
 
I'm frustrated.